Allow your wife to determine her comfort level, and help her make any adjustments to the pillows or her position if she needs them. Your wife shouldn’t lie on her back, especially after her fourth month of pregnancy. This can create pressure on major blood vessels that can lower your wife’s blood pressure and cause decreased blood supply to the baby. [3] X Research source A semi-reclining position can also be effective for massage. For instance, you may place a pillow against your belly, then have your wife lean into you so her back is against the pillow. She can also rest her head against your chest, especially if you’re just massaging her neck and scalp. However, if you’re massaging her shoulders and back, she’ll probably need to lean forward slightly. Your wife might also try kneeling on the floor facing the bed. She can then rest her arms on the bed to support herself, if that’s comfortable for her. [4] X Research source
This is a good massage to do when your wife is sitting down. You can also run your hands up and down the outside of her arms as you do this. Try walking your thumbs up and down her neck on either side of her spine, especially near the base of her skull and where her neck and shoulders meet.
You can also gently press in with your fists along her lower back. As your wife’s belly grows, it will create a lot of new pressure which can lead to back pain, especially at the end of a long day. Avoid massaging along her sides, as pressure in those areas can tickle or hurt.
When the rest of your wife’s body is feeling bulky and uncomfortable, a scalp massage can be a surprisingly soothing experience, and it can be a great way for you to be affectionate with her.
You can also gently pull on each of her toes, or you can rub between her toes with your fingers. Avoid putting any pressure between your wife’s heel and ankle bone. This area contains a pressure point that may stimulate contractions.
In addition, a massage may make your wife feel dizzy and ill, especially if she’s struggling with morning sickness. Many professional massage therapists will not offer prenatal massages during the first trimester. Even if you find someone who does offer it, it’s still a good idea to wait until after the first trimester, just to be on the safe side.
Other conditions where massage might not be a good idea might include if your wife has a fever, virus, or severe morning sickness.
Of course, it’s perfectly fine to rub your wife’s belly. Just keep your hands flat and use very light pressure. This can be a great way to feel your baby moving around, especially after week 24!
For instance, instead of squeezing your wife’s legs, where blood clots are especially a concern, you could run the heel of your hand up and down her leg muscles. Throughout the massage, ask your wife if there are any areas where she’d like you to apply a little more pressure or go a little easier.
Try using an unscented massage oil or lotion to help decrease friction during a massage.
For instance, you could help her sit up and rest against a pillow, then you might get her a glass of water while she relaxes. If your wife’s condition doesn’t improve within an hour, or if her contractions increase, call her primary care provider and ask them for advice. They may advise you to bring her to their office or take her to the hospital as a precaution.
