Wash your hair regularly and get it cut often so that it looks neat. Always wear clean clothes. Bathe every day to avoid smelling badly. You should also wear deodorant, and cologne/body spray/perfume if you’d like.
People tend to find under-eye bags creepy. If you have these, there are a variety of ways to minimize their appearance, including reducing your alcohol and sodium intake, treating your seasonal allergies, sleeping on your back, removing your makeup before bed, using sunscreen, quitting smoking, and applying a cool compress to your eyes. [4] X Research source Bulging eyes are also generally considered creepy. If you’re a woman, try applying dark eye shadow to your lids and curling your eyelashes to help them appear less bulging. [5] X Research source
Steer clear of clothing that doesn’t match or doesn’t fit you well. It’s also best to avoid anything that looks like it should be worn as part of a costume, like a cape. Don’t wear clothing with slogans that promote violence or dehumanize women, as this may make people think you are potentially violent, and thus creepy. [7] X Research source There’s nothing wrong with wearing clothes that express your personality, but if you’re really concerned about other people thinking you’re creepy, be careful about wearing anything too unique. If you’re unsure whether an outfit will make you look creepy, try asking a trusted friend or relative what they think. You don’t need to be extremely fashion forward to not look creepy. A simple pair of jeans and a t-shirt is usually a safe choice.
People tend to assume that individuals whose professions or hobbies involve death are creepy, so if you enjoy taxidermy or work as a mortician, you may want to avoid bringing these topics up with new acquaintances. If it comes up, you can laugh and acknowledge “It’s a little creepy!”, and then talk about a more cheerful topic. There are also some less obvious topics that many people find weird. The best example is clowns, which give lots of people the creeps. While talking about sex is not always creepy, talking about it constantly or at inappropriate times definitely is. If you’re ever unsure whether it is appropriate, avoid bringing it up. [9] X Trustworthy Source Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network Largest anti-sexual assault organization in the US providing support and advocacy for survivors Go to source
Even if you know someone well, be careful about asking obtrusive or rude questions. If you ever want to ask something but you’re not sure if it’s appropriate, consider prefacing the question by saying something like, “I’m sorry if this is a weird question” or “Forgive me for asking. " You can also say afterwards, “You don’t have to answer that if it’s too personal. "
Men are much more likely to be considered creepy when they make uninvited sexual advances on women than vice versa. In fact, women tend to think that “creepy” men pose some kind of sexual threat, and may be afraid of them. Compliments are okay, but try not to go overboard. If you have just met a person, try only offering one compliment instead of several. You can decrease your chances of the compliment being interpreted as creepy if you avoid staring at the person before offering it and if you try talking to the person and getting to know each other a bit first. Also, try to make compliments more general, such as, “I like your shirt!” or “Hey, where’d you get that phone case? It’s nice. " Don’t say stuff like, “Your eyes are beautiful. " or “You smell good. "
Don’t catcall; this is creepy and misogynistic. [12] X Research source Don’t assume that a friendly waiter or barista is flirting. Their job requires them to be polite, and they are “trapped” because they need to work and stay polite. [13] X Research source If you absolutely want to date them, leave your phone number with the check, so there is no pressure. Do not flirt with people who are much younger than you. If you are an adult, don’t flirt with minors, no matter how “mature” they look or act.
Some people are shy. If they are smiling, then gently proceed. If they look upset, stop right away. Start small. Talk to them, flirt, and see how they respond. Then amp it up if you are getting a positive response. Sending an unsolicited photo of your genitals to a stranger is the exact opposite of what you want to do. Some dating guides tell people (usually men flirting with women) to push the other person’s boundaries. This is bad advice, and may scare them and get you pepper sprayed. Always respect someone else’s comfort level. [15] X Research source
If someone looks like they want to leave a conversation, give them an opportunity to do so. Trying to make them stay can make you seem creepy. [16] X Research source Some people, especially women, disabled people, and abuse survivors, may be afraid to express boundaries. Pay attention to their body language. If they’re uncomfortable, it might be good to give them some space.
Potential dates are not your enemies. If you have to fight them in order to get to them, you’re doing it wrong, and it’s time to quit. [19] X Research source If someone turns you down, it isn’t a black mark against you. Maybe you aren’t their type, they’re too busy for a relationship, or their sexual orientation is incompatible. It doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with you, or that the universe is out to get you. It hurts, but you shouldn’t let it define you!
Avoid jumping out at people or trying to surprise them, unless you know the person and are doing it as a joke. Avoid sudden outbursts, especially if they could be interpreted as violent. If you feel an outburst coming on, say “I need some air” and leave to cool off. Always try to gauge the appropriateness of your behavior by assessing the atmosphere and watching how others are behaving. For example, if you are giving a formal presentation, you would be expected to stand up straight and look at the crowd, so people might find it creepy if you were sitting down and looking at the floor. [21] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U. S. National Institutes of Health Go to source
For example, a guy who pretends he just wants to be friends with a girl, and suddenly tells her that he likes her, may startle her and make her uncertain how to act. This guy would be better off flirting with her, continuing the flirtation if she responded well, and then explaining his feelings. This way, she is not caught by surprise, and has had time to get used to the idea.
Don’t talk down to others (including women and disabled people), and don’t use nicknames like “sweetie” or shortened names (e. g. calling a woman “Jessie” when everyone calls her Jessica) Save them for people you are close with, if they like it. Avoid stereotypes such as “that’s women’s work,” “Muslims are violent,” or “bisexuals are cheaters. " Work on being open-minded and accepting of others, and challenge any negative stereotypes. Know basic manners around disabled people. Respect their personal space, offer help before jumping in, don’t ask about their abilities to feed/clean/toilet/have sex,[24] X Research source and treat them like adults (unless they are literal children).
Instead of saying “I’m sorry, but. . . . " say “I’m sorry, and. . . " This makes it clearer that you aren’t trying to make an excuse, just offer an explanation, without diminishing any harm done. For example, “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable by complimenting your dress. I thought it was a nice dress, and my intent was to make your day a little better, not to make you uncomfortable. But clearly, that’s not what happened, and I’m very sorry. Can we start over?”
The reason that many people find masks creepy is because they obscure facial expressions. If your facial expressions don’t seem appropriate to other people, they will have the same reaction as they would to an expressionless mask. [27] X Research source If you feel that you are not able to show emotions with your facial expressions, pay close attention to the way that others look in specific situations and try to mimic their facial expressions. Practice in front of a mirror if you need to.
Examples of violent gestures include pointing your finger at someone (including yourself) as if it were a gun, cracking your knuckles while staring at someone, or pretending to slit your throat with your finger. There are many others as well, so always take a moment to think about how other people might perceive you before you make any gesture. Shouting at people may also make them worry that you will turn violent. Keep your volume moderate, even when you are upset.
Taking unwanted photographs is just as creepy as staring, if not more so. Asking for permission does not reduce the creepiness at all. [30] X Trustworthy Source International OCD Foundation Non-profit organization dedicated to helping everyone affected by Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and related disorders to live full and productive lives. Go to source On the flip side, people may also find it creepy if you don’t make eye contact while talking to them, so it’s important to find a healthy balance. If you have a disability that makes eye contact hard (e. g. autism), look at their forehead, eyebrows, nose, or chin. This is close enough. [31] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U. S. National Institutes of Health Go to source If you tend to get lost in thought, stare in a direction where there aren’t people. This way, they won’t think that you’re staring at them.
You do not need to touch someone in an inappropriate way in order for it to be perceived as creepy. Even an innocent touch can seem strange, especially if you do not know the person well. When you’re talking to someone, avoid cornering them and making them feel claustrophobic. If you’re going to touch someone, let them see it coming, so they aren’t startled. This way, they can also decline if they don’t want to be touched.
