Giving yourself plenty of “me-time” instead of being constantly available for a narcissistic partner Preventing a narcissistic ex-spouse from getting a bigger payout during the divorce proceedings[2] X Research source Blocking the phone number of a narcissistic parent Putting in 100% effort each day when you work for a narcissistic boss[3] X Research source
Journaling your thoughts and feelings Reminding yourself that the abuse wasn’t your fault Practicing self-care Visiting a therapist[4] X Trustworthy Source Cleveland Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source
Narcissistic Partner: “I can’t believe how messy the kitchen is. You never do anything to clean up around here. ” You: “You’re right—I said I was going to do the dishes after dinner and I totally blanked. That’s on me!” Narcissistic Parent: “You have all this free time but you never seem to be able to make time for me. ”You: “I understand where you’re coming from. I definitely lost track of time this past week, and I’m sorry that I forgot to give you a call. ” In the past, many narcissists were berated when they showed any sign of weakness—because of this, they’re never willing to take the blame for anything. Knowing this special psychological insight can give you the upper hand in a conversation.
Narcissistic Partner: “I can’t believe you forgot to pick me up from work! I can never rely on you. ”You: “You must have felt really frustrated when you had to wait around from me. I can definitely understand why you felt that way. ” Narcissistic Friend: “I can’t believe you couldn’t go with me to the movies yesterday. ”You: “That must have been really annoying that you had to go see the movie by yourself. ”
Cut a conversation with a narcissistic co-worker short and excuse yourself to work on something else Give your narcissistic partner absolutely no reaction when they try to push your buttons Stay on topic if you’re having a conversation with a manipulative, narcissistic parent
“I have to run to the grocery store. I’ll be back later!” “Sorry, but I really have to finish up this assignment before the end of the day. ” “Gotta go—this deadline isn’t going to meet itself!”
“I don’t appreciate being name-called. I’m leaving the room until you can speak to me respectfully. ” “Guilt-tripping is immature, and I’m not going to put up with it. I’m stepping back until you’re ready to have an actual conversation. ” “You’re speaking to me in a disrespectful tone, and that’s not okay with me. I won’t continue this conversation until you can talk to me in a civil way. ”
If you’re divorcing a narcissistic spouse, you might comment about how you want to keep the car when you’d really rather keep the house. Your spouse might try to sabotage your chances of getting the car as a means of control without realizing that they’re playing into your hand.
Complimenting them (“I’m always impressed by your focus and attention to detail. ”) Asking for their opinion (“How would you have done this differently?”) Using “we” statements (“I think we both said things that we regret. ”)
“Kyle said some really cruel things to me last night, but then told me I was ‘too sensitive’ when I called him out on it. Was I overreacting?” “I confronted Angie about what I found out, and she said that I was imagining things. Do you think that’s true, or is she just trying to gaslight me?”
Blocking them from your phone and social media Steering clear of any mutual friends Not allowing yourself to think about them[15] X Research source Going “no contact” might not be a feasible option at the moment if you’re stuck in abusive relationship. If you can’t leave your partner right away, start making an escape plan for the future. [16] X Research source