Smile and make eye contact. [2] X Research source Be friendly. [3] X Research source Talk about something appropriate when you initiate. In the back of her mind, the girl probably knows that you’re talking to her because she looks pretty, but you have to at least pretend to have a reason to talk to her. As long as it makes sense that you’d talk to her about it out of the blue, go for it: Don’t start with a cheesy pick up line like “If I were a stop light, I’d turn red every time you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer. " Let’s face it: these rarely work. Increase your chances by starting casual. [4] X Research source You might say something like “I heard you were in [so and so’s] class. My class sucks, so I’m thinking about transferring in there if I can. How is it?” Or you could try: “Hey, I saw you cheer last Friday at the football game. When is the next home game going to be?”
Try an indirect conversation starter. [6] X Research source An indirect conversation starter is where you just start talking to her without pointing out how beautiful she is. Remember to be confident. “I’m looking for a woman’s perspective on this. I was just talking to a friend whose girlfriend broke up with him. The problem is that she keeps calling him. Why does she do it?” Or: “Maybe you can help me out. I’m new here and I don’t really know what people do for fun. What do you and your friends do for the weekend?” If you’re a little more confident, you can try a more direct approach. Remember that this approach has a bigger chance of backfiring, but it could also really impress the girl. “I don’t usually say this, but you’re absolutely the most stunning girl that I’ve seen in the past. . . 3 minutes. Hi, my name is [your name]. " “Sorry to bother you, but you look too good to be alone right now. Do you mind if I walk with you for a little bit?”
“Hi, those are wonderful earrings. Did you make them?” “Hi, that’s a beautiful dress, did you make it yourself?” “Hi there, I couldn’t help but noticing how your dress matches your eyes. It’s a great color. " Whatever you do, don’t talk about feminine body parts, as a rule. Almost all girls are turned-off when you talk about their breasts or butt. So don’t shoot yourself in the foot; stick to complimenting her hair, eyes, lips, or clothes.
If the conversation has hit a natural cliff, don’t be afraid to simply say: “It was nice meeting you. I’ll see you around some time?” If the conversation goes really well — she’s laughing and flirting with her eyes — ask for her phone number. Just a simple, “Hey, can I get your phone number? Maybe we can meet outside of class?”
Ask her questions to keep her talking: “How do you like school?” “Have any plans for college yet?” “What clubs have you heard good things about?” Tell her funny stories or jokes. Girls love guys with a playful sense of humor. [8] X Research source Keep things light, maybe even a bit sarcastic. If she makes fun of you, don’t take it personally and don’t be afraid to laugh at yourself. Be there for her. When she’s off at a swim competition or she’s competing in a debate, show her that you care by being there. If she’s made it clear she doesn’t like it, don’t do this. But if she’s on the fence, this might tip the scales.
Just because you validate a girl doesn’t mean she’ll validate you back. Just like how you only validate girls who are attractive, they’ll only validate guys who are attractive. So show her how you are attractive with your interests, beliefs, values, and hobbies.
Escalate physically starting with secret handshakes to tickle fights to hugs and kisses. Escalate conversationally by getting her number and talking to her over the phone; if you’re too shy to do that then ask for her Facebook. Lots of guys never ask for a girl’s phone number. The girl takes this as a sign that the guy doesn’t like them. Don’t fall into this scenario.
Stay clean. [11] X Research source Girls are suckers for clean guys. Shower regularly, floss and brush your teeth twice daily. You need to smell nice to make an impression. Purchase or find some low-rise, slim fit pants or jeans. If you’re on the heavier side, baggier pants are probably better (but don’t get lost in a sea of cloth). Skinny jeans that hug every inch of your legs are probably not the best fit, unless you’re sure you can pull it off. Purchase or find some trim collared shirts. You don’t need dragons or tribal patterns on your shirts to impress girls. A simple plaid, one-tone, or striped pattern will do. Purchase or find some soft, simple sweaters or jackets. Give girls an excuse to get close to you. V-necks are in style currently. Crew necks and hoodies also work. Go with what you think will look good on you. Get a nice haircut. Yes, you might have to shell out more than $20 for a haircut. But it will be worth it. Look through magazines like GQ or Vanity Fair and bring a picture along of someone who has the cut you’d like. [12] X Research source
Get involved in what you like. High school can be tough for a lot of us because we’re still figuring out what we like and what we don’t. If you do have hobbies, interests, or curiosities, find other people who share that share passion. Chances are you’ll get along with them. Do favors for other people. Don’t let other people walk all over you and exploit you, but help out people who seem trustworthy and appreciative. Your social stock will climb. Do things outside of school. The guy who’s connected to a social scene outside of school attracts a lot of people (guys and girls) because the school scene often lacks that edge and vibrancy.
Don’t pin all your hopes on a single girl. Pin your hopes on her after you’ve started a relationship, if you get that far. But it’s probably a bit unhealthy to do so before then. If you’re not being rejected some of the time, you’re not trying. Normal guys — guys not named Brad Pitt or George Clooney — get rejected all the time. If you’re not being rejected, you’re not putting yourself out there. Keep on trying. Pull yourself up when a girl throws you down. If you sit around and mope about your problems, letting your self-esteem take a serious hit, you actually become less attractive to other girls. Try to stay happy and thick-skinned.
